The Seat at the Table Isn't About the Title

Welcome to Live Wire.

Here's the premise: we're all energy. You walk into a room, a company, a conversation with someone, and before anyone says a word, you already know if you're leaning in or backing away. That's a signal. Live Wire is where I talk about what that signal actually is, in the rooms I'm in and the ones you're trying to get into.

First issue, and I'm starting with the question I get asked more than any other.

I've reported to the CEO since I was 26. First as an employee with a direct line to the top. Now I run my own business, and I report to five CEOs at once, none of whom have to keep me in the room.

And the question I get more than any other is some version of: how do I earn a seat like that?

For a long time my answer was some flavor of "work hard, be good at your job." True, but useless. It doesn't explain why some very good, very hardworking people still sit outside the room.

Here's what actually earns the seat: you become the person the room can't make the decision without.

Not the person with the right title. Not the person who's there because the org chart says they should be. The person whose perspective changes the outcome, who shows up with a solution or a sharp question that moves the business forward instead of a status update on a problem. When you're that person, nobody invites you because policy says your function belongs in the room. They invite you because deciding without you means deciding half-blind.

That's the signal: insight, not title. Solutions and good questions, not status updates.

One caution here: this isn't a license to walk in with an opinion on everything. A know-it-all whose solutions don't land gets the same result as no title at all: out of the room. What earns the seat isn't having an answer ready, it's understanding the problem well enough that your answer is right.

I was talking recently with the CEO of a $12 billion private company, and he said almost the same thing back to me from the other side of the table. He doesn't need people with a fancy title to influence across the business. He needs people who can do it without one.

That tracks with how people actually perform. Nobody does their best work because a boss is standing over them with a threat. Fear buys compliance, not commitment, and it definitely doesn't buy someone's best thinking. So scratch the title, scratch the org chart. What actually wins hearts and minds, and gets the real work done, is trust. Leaders who collaborate and give credit where it's due earn something a title can't buy: real loyalty.

A title gets you through the door once. It doesn't keep you in the room. What keeps you in the room is what you put into it, every single time you're there. I learned that going from one CEO to five: no shared history, no tenure, no default trust. Every room, I start from zero and earn it again.

It's not about walking into the next meeting with a hot take. It's about doing the work before you're in the room: understand the business and the actual problem, know who owns the decision, and know what inputs they need to make a good call that moves the mission forward. Show up with that, and you stop being someone who's briefed and start being someone who's consulted.

So here's the question I'd ask you this week: if the invite depended entirely on what you bring, not your role, not your seniority, would you still get one?

More from me every week in Live Wire.

Talk soon, Anita